It has been a while since I’ve posted anything. I am not sure what I was building this into before but I definitely want to try and build something.
Time goes by so quickly. I have loved and made changes and lived life. I recently got married and it has been good. Really good. We were together quite a while before and it was just the logical next step. We both work well together and though I know at times we drive each other crazy, we love each other.
I have always believed in love. I don’t know if I’ve really had a grasp of it, not really until now. I think love means something different to us all. Love is elusive and ever changing but true love lasts. I think this is true and I’d bet my life we make it. I can’t imagine not having him with me.
Anyway, I’ve been in a more thoughtful mood lately as well. So much has gone on in the world as well as my small portion of the grand production. There is so much hate and mistrust in the world and it is frightening. At times of uncertainty I retreat into books, movies, and tv shows. I escape the uncertainty of life with the craziness of Hollywood. It is a good escape.
I want to write and share again. I still have things to say, my story is far from over and I feel just getting started so this is still me. A story in my heart and flowing through my finger tips onto the screen. I believe writing and artistic expression is the best way to release your feelings, it at least works for me. I am here again on my mission, no pursuit, to find the creativity in the world and share pieces of me with each blog post I share. I look forward to this journey with you all. Let’s be creative and give even the ugliest of emotions beauty through the expression.
You need someone to hate,
Someone to throw your rage at,
Let it be me because I can take it,
I have grown to understand the fall.
Let me give you a simple anecdote,
That tells of a heart breaking,
Crashing like the waves on a shoreline,
With the sun setting the in background.
There are times when you are lucky and get exactly what you are looking for and you find amazing beauty around you that you had not seen before. I was pleased in the picture below to see a bee flying around. I had no idea that I had captured it, glad while I was taking the picture I didn’t notice it, but now looking back I think it adds something to the image, just like in life when we might have missed something but then take a closer look.
Photo Credit: BC Hickey
Sometimes all that we can do is be who we are and hope that others find something in us to love. That is how it feels most of the time, that we are blindly loving and opening our hearts to others, with little or not knowing if that love will be returned. Often times people fail to live up to the expectations that we have put out there for them and so really is that their failure or our own? Should we judge people based on what we want from them or should we allow them to be who they are and judge them based on that?
This is both for personal and public use. I am writing with an idea in mind. Recently I have stumbled onto a highly publicized yet casually dismissed problem: online dating scams (online scams in general). I have begun, only this weekend, to research the hazards and dangers that are associated with these types of scams. It’s sad, like most things, people dismiss them as nothing and only “stupid” people fall victim to such things, but that is not the case. I guess I have a new found intrigue and desire to research this issue and truly bring these victims to light and offer assistance in any way possible.
I could be taking something from the news and working on writing up my segment about having something to say, but things have been on my mind recently. Scams and relationships. I have recently stumbled upon a whole new world and my mind has gone into the realm of lies and deceit. I don’t understand why people hide themselves or things from those who they claim to love. Call me naive or stupid, whatever, but if you are going to be in a relationship then you have to be open and honest, period. Is there any other way to be?
It seems like all the important things in life require an application. It seems like almost everything nowadays you have to fill out some kind of paperwork, for a driver’s license, college, job, marriage certificate, etc., but to be a friend nothing. You simply meet someone, find common interest or ground and then all the sudden you are inviting them into your world and life and you really have no idea what you are in for. This can both be an exciting and heartbreaking part of life. Relationships are complicated and in all honesty, we go into all of them blind and just end up hoping for the best.
Friend of course is a noun and in the dictionary is defined as “a person who you like and enjoy being with; a person who helps or supports someone or something (such as a cause or charity)”.
It’s all perfectly summed up right there like a nice present with a beautiful bow on top, “person you like being with”. If only life was that simple and non-complex, that who we like being with also feels the same and has the same expectations.
There are many things going on in the world right now. We are transitioning from Spring to Summer, kids are getting out of school or graduating but life is still happening. There is still just as much, if not more, bad out there with the good. This was a story I heard which is both frustrating and upsetting as well as just sad. There is much to be said about this, but more looking from the one left behind rather than a debate on guilt or innocence. I am not judge or jury, so that is not for me to decide.
Come to me,
Oh sweet release,
Let me rest,
Here in your peace,
Overflowing, washing clean,
Change my doubts,
Into what could be.