Finding Your Place

They say to be a writer you have to be a reader. I try to read all I can and I want to write and share but a lot of the time it just seems like there is just so much to do. The other day I watched a Youtuber talk about the state of Youtube and where he fit. It really spoke to me because I have similar thoughts and struggles.

No one wants to be the one ignored. We all want to go viral and have our words matter to others. They say you have to be clear about what you are doing so that you can reach your audience. I have a hard time with that because who is my audience? I love writing, movies and TV but i don’t really want to review. So where do I fit?

I am a writer but I also work full time and I am recently married. I have a lot going on and a lot of time I just can’t seem to find the time and energy. I know they say it is all about a schedule but how difficult is that when you have to consider someone else. I can’t plan my time out because you never know what could happen or come up. It is just too much.

It is also difficult to find your place out here in the world. The real world and the online worlds are both hard. You have to write not only to share your own thoughts but in a way that speaks or reaches others. If you aren’t connecting then what is the point? Should you just randomly and mindlessly put your thoughts and self out there regardless of if anyone is reading?

I am not sure where I fit. I have a hard time really connecting and I am honestly not sure why. I don’t know if I don’t fit because I don’t want to fit or if I just don’t fit with the people around me. I have always felt like an outsider. I feel like the watcher. The person that is just there and people can interact with you or they can ignore you but it doesn’t really affect others one way or the other.

I guess I just still, being 30 years old, I don’t know what I want. I still want to matter. I want to be relevant. I want people to read my words and think yeah I get that. I want people to connect with me and I want to connect with others. I want to know what people want to read, yet just like with TV, the wants and desires change so quickly. So they say be true to you. I know that I still don’t know what that means to me so in all this mess I will figure that out too. I hope as I do that others will take the journey with me.

Thanks as always for reading! Be sure to follow! I post a new opinion piece (I’ve Got Something to Say About This…) every Monday and new movie quote with story(When Movies Say It Best) every Friday.

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