Our Own Happiness

Sometimes all that we can do is be who we are and hope that others find something in us to love. That is how it feels most of the time, that we are blindly loving and opening our hearts to others, with little or not knowing if that love will be returned. Often times people fail to live up to the expectations that we have put out there for them and so really is that their failure or our own? Should we judge people based on what we want from them or should we allow them to be who they are and judge them based on that?

Of course, the obvious and easy answer, would be that first we shouldn’t judge but also we should allow people to be who they are. We can’t expect someone to know what we want, no matter how well they know us, unless we talk to them. People find themselves trapped inside their own games and misconceptions unable to see what is really there in front of them. Just like men tell women that “they aren’t mind readers”. Well, get a clue, none of us are. There are those who are perceptive and might see things that others don’t, but we aren’t, any of us, mind readers. Unless someone clearly, not speaking in riddles and metaphors, tells you what they want and expect from you then there is nothing that you can or cannot do. You just continue to be who you are and who you are to them and if they get upset because you fail to be something they built up in their minds, well that is on them.

I think at times we fall into this trap of expecting too much from people. I think that I am very much like that. We forget to see that each person is in fact their own person. We all have different ideas about life, love and happiness and no two views are exactly the same. That is what makes us interesting and what makes this life worth living, because we get to learn and grow together. If we fail to see things from the perspective of those around us or those we are in a relationship with, then what is the point? Isn’t that just a selfish pursuit of doing what you love and want expecting others to follow it and feel the same, yet then when they don’t, you push them aside saying they are infringing on your happiness. But just because you get happiness from something doesn’t mean that everyone does, and if you refuse to share that with another then you in fact are the one infringing on their happiness.

Sometimes we forget to see the forest through the trees, as they say. We get so focused on me, me, me that we forget to see the big picture. It’s scary giving our heart or opening it up to another person because that means it could be broken or shattered. Honestly though, that is what life is all about, opening ourselves up to all the experiences, good and bad, of life. We could close ourselves off and push others away, but in the end that just makes us unhappy. I think that we just need to have our eyes open, see things and take them for what they are and allow the world to surprise us. Love and life are beautiful things if we just get out of the away and allow them to be.

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